Locked My Self

Not once but already twice I left my house key inside the house and locked myself out. I'm a bit sleepy and so thirsty. I have no where to go but to wait for Maxwell. He has an extra key with him. I guess I'll have to postpone my sleep until Maxwell gets here.

Since I can't go inside the house, might as well play AION here in the internet cafe. Damagan na to!

AION Ranger

I've played AION for a few months now. I'm an Elyos by the way. I tried templar, gladiator, assassin, chanter, cleric and now my favorite - ranger. I usually play melee characters since the start of online games. Assassins are always my first choice but this time around, I got stuck with a range toon. Rangers are fun to play with or maybe it just suited my playing style for this game. As I was starting out my ranger named Fukitsunatenshi, I was also looking for someone who could teach me how to play it right. On a game forum, I found someone who is kind enough to really teach me almost everything I should know about a ranger. His name is Ivandunn. Everyday we exchange messages, him teaching me hints and tricks, until I've developed my own ranger style. I changed manastones for a few times to find a good combination that will match my game style. Over time, I managed to acquire my ABG items and grown to fight a type of ranger that is only driven to kill Asmodians. During raids, I get to manage to kill plenty of them and even at times I reach 100+ kills in just a few hours. I'm proud to be an Elyos. Proud to be a ranger. And proud to be Pinoy!

Very Bad Day

I had a very bad day. For months, I had been planning to go to church today but I wasn't able to. I'm not blaming anyone though but I was so furious and frustrated. I really wanted to break something... or someone.

Later, tonight I realized I made another mistake by posting of my Facebook some foul words. Well, I guess I'm allowed to do that once in awhile. Especially when I am so angry and ticked off. And I felt better though because Yesha told me it's alright and that she misses me. That felt really comforting. I guess I can now sleep soundly tonight.

Church

It has been so long since the last time I went to church. But early tomorrow I'm going to church again. I feel excited and hopeful. I could not even remember when was the last time I was on church. Finally, I get to be on church again and meet again my friends and most importantly, get to hear the Word of God.

So I'm off to bed now and need to rest so that I can wake up early tomorrow.

The Spirit of Christmas

I planned before to have roasted chicken and ice cream for Christmas. That was still the plan until a few more hours before Christmas, my neighbors brought different kinds of food. So aside from my roasted chicken and ice cream, I also have macaroni, afritada, humba, sinuglaw spaghetti and keso de bola. And exactly 12am of Christmas, I enjoyed my meal so much! It was indeed a celebration for me though I was all alone.

Happy birthday Jesus! Thank you for saving me. Thank you for the blessings. Thank you for your mercy and grace. Thank you for loving me and for being with me always. I offer to You my life and my love. Teach me your ways and let your Word grow in me so that I'll be worthy to be called "Christian".

It's Almost Christmas

Even if I'm alone this Christmas, I already have some food in mind to prepare. I'll just buy roasted chicken and ice cream. I wanted to cook spaghetti though but I'm too lazy right now. I hope I can buy Double Dutch ice cream. Actually, I'm kinda excited to celebrate Christmas again, on my own. But I miss my family so much.

I bought a present for a friend. I hope she'll like my gift. It may not be a surprise to her though because she already knew what my gift is. But she doesn't know the color. I do hope she likes purple.

No Direction

when you are alone in life, you have less ambitions and goals. You work just for your self and you don't strive hard to earn more. Life is simple and easy. You don't worry much. It's like you have nothing to live for.

when you are alone, your life is like an empty room. you sleep at night but you don't dream at all. You are sheltered but not secured. You can scream but no one hears you. And even if you fill this room with things, it will never be complete.

when you are alone in life, you can do pretty much anything you want. you care less what tomorrow will bring. and you can literally waste your time doing nothing.

Life has no direction if you're all alone.

Eat and Sleep

i thought i could finish may Tagalog poem today but i didn't. i'll just finish it some other time. i haven't slept well since we've started our internet cafe. i really want to sleep like 10 to 12 hours but i can't. i don't have the luxury. half of it is what i get. good thing a friend can look after the cafe once in a while so i can get an extra hour of sleep. not only i am deprived of sleep but also food. sometimes i can only manage to eat 1 meal a day. lucky for me i have friends who could bring me food or cook for me. like tonight, a friend volunteered to cook my dinner. corned beef, sausages and canton guisado plus rice equals stuffed belly. i hope i could get to eat more and sleep more.

First Three Stanzas

Nung una kitang makita, sayo ako ay natulala

Akala ko'y ika'y anghel na bumaba bigla sa lupa.

Nang ikaw'y aking lapitan 'di mo 'ko pinapansin,

Ang aking mga ngiti lumilipad lamang sa hangin.

Nagdaan ang mga araw at ikaw ay namimiss ko

Walang ibang hiling kung 'di ikaw'y makatabi ko.

Sana dinggin ng May Kapal ang aking pagdarasal

Na ako'y iyong ibigin kahit na ito ay bawal.

Buksan mo man ang aking puso at aking isipan,

Walang ibang makikita kundi ang iyong pangalan.

'Di man dumating ang panahon na ako'y iyong ibigin.

Asahan mong ikaw pa rin ang aking mamahalin.

To be continued...

My Poems

I've been writing poems for many years and I just realized I haven't written a single Filipino poem. Well, actually I wrote one and it's about mothers but the problem is I gave it to someone for her school assignment and I don't have a copy of it. So this gives me an idea to make a Filipino poem. I'll try to make it as beautiful as I can since it'll be my first time to make one.

Feverish

Not feeling well for the past few days. My eyes are kinda burning with fire and my throat is clogged phlegm. Some headache and body pains. I need to sleep now but I still want to play AION with some of my friends. Maybe I can sleep later though it's 2:24 AM already.

Police Blotter

Went to the police station to blotter someone who technically stole my dad's car. Still have to follow up some things at Highway Patrol Group this coming Monday. The last thing I would want to see is to see this person behind bars but the thing is, it's like he doesn't show any regrets on what he did.

Why do people do stupid things? Do they think they can just do anything? Maybe this person in particular has no shame at all or has ran out of it.

Eye Wear

A friend of mine got a new pair of reading glasses and I was able to try it on yesterday. It kinda look nice on me and so I decided to buy my own. I went to a mall this afternoon and I was eating at KFC, I saw a a pair of glasses that I was looking for quite some time. After eating my meal I hurriedly went to the eye-glasses store and tried the black-framed glasses. Perfect! Made for each other. So even if I don't have much money, I still bought it and was so happy wearing it. And as I was resting on a bench, I noticed some girls are looking at me... or maybe at my new eye-wear.

I guess this is the day I'll start wearing glasses. ^^,

Katawa Sab!

TEACHER: magpaclass picture ta para inig dako ninyo mkaingon mo,

"wow si dodong police na."

"wow si inday nurse na."

"wow si tomas doctor na."

JUAN: "wow si ma'am patay na."

TEACHER: Lingkod animal! Ayaw ug apil ha!

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BOY: Miss, pwede ko bang IPASOK and aking pag-ibig sa BUTAS ng iyong PAGMAMAHAL?

GIRL: Sobra ka namang manligaw, SALITA pa lng NAKAKABUNTIS ka na nang damdamin.

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The cat fell into the water, then the rooster laughed.

Morel Lesson: a wet pussy makes a cock happy. ^^,

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Sa usa ka BUNYAG;

PARI: unsay ngalan sa baby?

AMAHAN: SURF padre.

PARI: d pwede kay ngalan na sa sabon.

AMAHAN: ang ako lagi misis kay PERLA man ang ngalan. unya ako ngalan kay ARIEL man.

PARI: aw, hala unsa man atong ibendeta ani DOWNY o ZONROX?

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PEDRO in war with MILF

PEDRO: surender na mo!

MILF: mo surender lng mi kung ma-spell nimo ang ceasefire!

PEDRO: padayon ang gyera! dugmokon silang tanan. padalhan mo nku ug chrysanthemum sa inyong lubong!

MILF: spell chrysanthemum?

PEDRO: pakyu! ingon ko rose, bungol! patay kung patay wla lay spellingay!

The First Time

In a crowded place, you stand out from the rest.

I was looking at you, trying to catch your eyes.

You looked passed me but still I gave you a smile.

The time went by yet my eyes are still on you.

I wanted to ask for your name and your number

But I was too afraid that you might ignore me.

I really wanted to stay longer but I have to leave.

As I left my chair I glanced at you once again,

Hoping for the last time you would notice me.

I found myself thinking so much about you.

I was wondering what could be your name.

I was praying that we would meet again.

That was the very first time I saw you.

And from that moment on, I started missing you.

Busy Day

It's Monday but it was a busy day for me. Lots of customers came and I'm so thankful to God that he continuously send people in out cafe. Right now I'm so sleepy already. Haven't slept well for several days. I really want to sleep at least 8 hours but it's so hard to reach it. Hopefully tonight I could more sleep. I need a well rest.

I ate too much today and I'm still hungry. Must be my Hyperthyroidism again. I'm still craving for ice cream, pizza, burger and fries. Luckily, I'll get 2 cheese burgers in a few minutes. I'm drooling already. ^^,

Tiring Day

This is a long and tiring day for me. Super busy attending to our customers' needs. Haven't got a break the whole 15 hours. Almost no time to eat. I'm feeling hungry and dizzy. I was suppose to go at a police precinct to blotter someone but I was so caught up with work at our internet cafe. I;m so craving right now for pizza, burger, fries and ice cream.

Someone emailed me this morning. I think he feels threatened and jealous because Purpz and I are seeing each other. He even told what to do and not to do. Pfft! You have no slightest right to tell me that. And don't act like you're the boyfriend because you're not. Whether you like it or not, you are only a friend to her just like me. And don't go telling me who I am because you don't know a thing about me. Don't tell me I don't care for her as much as you do because you don't know what I am feeling. Do your self a favor - back off.

Almost Christmas

A few more days and I'll be spending Christmas all by myself for the 2nd time around. I've been wondering what will I do on that day. I'm pretty sure I can't be with her so I'm still looking for a back up plan. I have a few ideas in mind but no final plans yet. I really want to have a puppy. A pitbull. Yeah, that would be a great gift for myself but I'm not sure if I can afford. But just the thought of it makes me smile already. I wish someone would give me one.

I'm having difficulty in breathing. Must be my asthma or due to lack of sleep. Palpitations. Dizziness. I need to rest now.

When I See Her

We've seen each other a few times and there's something I noticed - I catch myself thinking about her for the next few days. Just like yesterday when we got to spend together almost the whole day. Thanks to a friend who made an effort to spoil the fun at the end of the day. Nonetheless, it was a good day for me and Miss Purple. For the past few weeks, I only get to be happy is when I'm with her and I think she doesn't notice it. Anyways, I spend the next few days thinking about her after we've seen each other. Just like now. As we have spent time together yesterday, I'd now be spending the next few days missing her and wishing to be with her. When I think of her I smile but when I'm with her I'm in a bliss.

A common friend of ours doesn't want us to be together. She thinks I would only hurt Miss Purple in the end. I strongly disagree. However, at times.. err, often times I try not to see her anymore. Not because I might hurt her but because I know I would end up broken again.

My Kinds of Friends

Friends are there so that when you fall they'd help you stand or if you are happy they'd be also happy for you. Friends are there to make you feel good when you're gloomy and support you on your endeavors. There are plenty of reasons why we have friends. But just this evening, I realized the different kinds of friends that I have.

Fake Friends - they look real from the outside but on the inside, they just want/need something from you. They are like leeches. They will suck out your blood until there is none. They don't believe in you.

Judas-like Friends - I'd say they are the most common friends. You get all the praises when you're in front of them but once you turn your back, they'd stab you over and over again. Normally, the kindest friend(but only when you are with them).

Know-it-all Friends - these are the ones that act like they know you very well but in fact they don't. They would love talking to you then twist your stories and tell it to other people. Even at times they would put words into your mouth.

Transient Friends - they come and go as life goes on. Some have purposes why you've met them and some are just for nuisance. a kind of friend who will never be there in the end.

Passive Friends - they are just there! They couldn't care less whether you're right or wrong. They don't really love you but they don't hate you either. The word Neutral suits them.

Superhero Friends - the kind of friends everyone should have. They are not around always but suddenly arrives when you need a friend the most. They couldn't stand seeing you on the ground. the type of friend you can always count on.

Martyr Friends - the type of friends that aren't that close to you but consider you as a true friend. Even it seems you've forgotten them, they will always be there for you no matter what.

True Friends - when you're happy they'd be happy too. when you're down, always there to lend a hand. when you're wrong, they would not despise you but rather correct you. When you are lost of words, they would sit beside you. They would share a tear, do silly things with you, and will be there even if your hair turns to grey.

If I may ask you my friends, which one are you?

Meet Up

In 4 hours I'll be meeting up with Miss Purple. She asked me to accompany here. I'm not sure where we are going but I think it's about completing her requirements at a job she applied. I'm really worried if I can wake up early. I may not be able to wake up in just a four hour sleep. If ever I can't make it, I hope she'll forgive me. But I'd still do my best to be with her. So, goodnight!

Forgotten Love

You know how much I love you. You are one the best things that ever happened in my life. But when you left me alone under the rain, I have to do something to forget you. And so I ignored you for a year or so. It wasn't easy. It wasn't nice at all. But that's the only way to reset my heart. I know I didn't do that to you once but twice. And yes I have terrible mood swings. I still have it now you know. I so cherish you and the memories that we've created.

Now that I have buried my hatchet, I really hope you would do the same. Let's make a new beginning as friends. And this time let's make sure it'll last forever.

I Wanna

I wanna be the one to hold your hand

when you feel all alone and sad.

I wanna be the one to dry your tears

and kiss away all those fears.

I wanna be the one to catch you if you fall,

I will be there even if i have to crawl.

I wanna be the one who makes you laugh

when things with you are rough.

I wanna be the one to sit beside you

when you're feeling happy or blue.

I wanna be the one who makes your life colorful

even if you want it all purple.

Be it sunny or stormy weather...

Be it a smooth or bumpy road...

Even if I have to swim or fly...

No matter what...

I will always be there for you,

You can count on that.

I'm Torn

I always tell myself that I'm OK. Convincing myself that I've already move on and is ready to have another relationship. But every time I think about Piggy Face or get a message from her, every hurt come rushing again. It's like reliving all the pain that I've been through. Today, we texted a bit and it made me realize how much I'm missing her. I still can't accept the fact that she left me and that she doesn't love me anymore. For so long I've been waiting for someone like her. I said to myself that this is it, she's the one. Yeah she's the one indeed. The one who tore my heart into bits and pieces.

I thought I would never be torn again, but I was wrong. Well, I guess I'll always be aymtorn.

Fried Chicken and Chocolates

Not my usual day. I went to SM to unwind a little. It was Saturday so the place was filled with people. I hate crowds. It makes my head swirl. The only good thing about it is that I can see lots of pretty girls(hehe). I was with a my best friend Joseph. I haven't seen him for quite sometime. I told him "chix chix sa ta d lagi ko mo sumbong kay mommy(his wife and a very good friend of mine too)". We had a good laugh. It was actually relaxing and fun. We ate at KFC and ordered 4 burgers and some fries. It's always nice to have real friends around.

I promised Miss Purple to bring her "pasalubong". She doesn't want to tell me what she wants but nonetheless I was able to made her spit it out. Fried Chicken and Chocolates. I bought her 3 bars of Snickers and I was so right about it because she was also thinking about Snickers. I can read her mind. Nah! It was just a good hunch. As for the fried chicken, I invited her for dinner at my place. It has been days since I saw her so I made lots of alibis just for me to see her. I really wanted to cook for her but time didn't allow it. Hopefully, she loves spaghetti. I can cook that well. I might be able to impress her. After dinner we watched a horror film - Haunting in Connecticut. Oh we also took some pictures. Well, I just wanted to have pictures of her, that's all. She went home around 1 in the morning.

I'm kinda missing her already. When she's around I feel wanted. I feel happy and carefree. All my problems just simple fade away when I get to see her. How I wish I could get to see her more often.

Skinhead

I got a new haircut. Well, not really new since I always get this type of haircut. Skinhead!!! I shaved my beard too. I don't like having no beard. I look weird.

Still 11:00 PM but I'm very sleepy already. I had a tiring day so I'll be in bed earlier than I normally do. When you're all alone and you have nothing much to do, you will just want to go to sleep . It sucks living alone.

It's nice to write blogs again. I get to vent what I really really feel. And the best thing about my blog is no one reads it so it stays pretty much private.

Missing Two Persons

My day went boring. As always, nothing to do but to play computer games. Sometimes it feels like it's the only thing I'm good at. I just wanted for the day to end so that I can go to sleep. I got hungry so I cooked something to eat. Before I get to finish what I'm cooking, I realized I'm missing someone. Actually, I'm missing to persons. One is someone whom I really care so much and the other one is someone a barely know. I could not tell whom I miss more. Maybe I just miss them both. If only wishes do come true.

UTANG

nangutang ang akong kaila na si juan ug karne sa among silingan. among gisugba ang karne ug gi adobo ang uban. pipila ka adlaw ni agi gibayaran ni juan ang iyang utang. mi-labay ang mga adlaw nangutang usab si juan ug karne. sige na sya ug utang apan ginabayaran man sab nya. ni abot ang panahon nga sige gihapon sya ug utang pero wala na sya gabayad sa iyang utang mao ning dako kini. sige na ug singil ang giutangan nya apan wala man siyay ikabayad. usa ka adlaw wla na magpakita si juan. ang nahitabo, ako na nuon pabayaron sa iyang utang kay ni apil man daw ko ug kaon nya sa among balay man daw gihatod ang karne.

lesson: ayaw mo ug kaon kung inutang ra kay basin dili makabayad ang nangutang, kamo pa unya singilon sa nagpautang.

serious note: why would i pay something na dili man ako nag utang? in the first place wla man ko ni ingon na pautangon ninyo sya. secondly, just because ni apil ko ug kaon sa karne and dri sa balay giluto doesn't mean kung dili mo mabayaran ako na mo bayad.

Despicable Me

I had a lousy day. Nothing much to do except to play AION. Playing online games could really a lot of your time and before you know it, you already played 10hrs. I' starting not to miss her anymore. I guess that's how it should be. Sometimes you need to let go of someone you really hold dear.

Before going to sleep and writing this entry I watched Despicable Me. It gave me a good laugh. I could barely breath anymore. Something I really needed. It has been awhile since I laughed that hard. Definitely, I'm going to watch this movie again.